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Wed, Aug. 2nd, 2006, 10:56 pm
anaterasu: Demon #4 NEEDS donuts!!!

(Due to a lack of activity in the Suburbanite Evil scenario *glares at Keith*, I have decided to start a new chapter in the insanity we call Woop. This chapter is based on a conversation between Keith and Rachel. Enjoy... and prepare to loose points off your IQ!)

Once upon a time, there lived a happy little demon...

Demon #4: I'm so happy!!

... He was a very happy demon...

Demon #4: I'm very happy!

...But one day, Demon #4 felt a rumble in his tummy, which could only mean one thing...

Demon #4: I'm pregnant with the lamp shade's baby!
Lamp Shade: ... But I used protection! o.o!

........No, not that. Demon #4 was hungry...

Demon #4: How'd you know that?! *gasp!* Are you telepathetic?!?!

......I believe the term you are looking for is, "telepathic" and no I am not. I am merely reading the script...

Demon #4: Are you invisible?

...No Demon #4, I am a narrator sitting in a studio reading a script some crazed girl gave me. (Crazed girl=Rachel). But that wasn't before she began chasing after some guys dressed as vampires. Seriously, what was up with that? That girl's got a vampire fetish, I swear. But nevermind that. I'm telling a story...

Demon #4: I have a rash on my butt!

What?

Demon #4: Rachel tells me not to scratch it but I do anyways! *scratches rash* It's our secret, okay?

... Sure. Now, can we please continue with the story?

Demon #4: ... I like bacon!!

Thu, Apr. 27th, 2006, 08:05 pm
anaterasu: Suburbanite Evil (It's not Resident Evil, I swear! *swifty eyes*)

(I thought it was about time to start a new RP.)

Rachel: *bursts through the wall* I have big news!
Christa: Tom Cruise finally came out of the closet?
Rachel: No, not yet. *grin* *turns to audience* Yes, I went there. *back to Christa* I got a job at Wall-Mart
Demon Janitor: Oh crap. This is bad
Rachel: Why?
Demon Janitor: You mean you forgot how happened on your past job?
*FLASHBACK*
*McDonalds two years ago... It's lunchtime and everyone is happily eating their mediocre artifical meat when suddenly...*
Rachel: *running out of the kitchen with her hand missing* AHH!! THE MEAT GRINDER TOOK MY HAND!!
Customers: O.O! *vomit, throw burgers aside and run*
Rachel: *takes artifical blood soaked arm* Suckers
Manager: *GLARE!*
*End of Flashback*
Demon Janitor: And lets not forget the time you worked at JCPenny
*FLASHBACK*
*People are trying on clothes in the dressing room*
Rachel: Dammit! There's no toliet paper in this stall!
Customers: *just stare*
*End of flashback*
Rachel: Well, this is different. It's Wall-Mart. Just look at their new ad
Christa: *reads ad aloud* "Welcome to Wall-Mart. We own your soul" Wow, that's a great marketing campaign.
Rachel: Yeah, I love the smiley face with the crazed expression holding a blood soaked knife. It can only mean good things *nod*
Christa: *nod* I agree. I'm sure nothing out of the ordinary will happen *smile*

Thu, Apr. 27th, 2006, 03:54 pm
zyphur_yukasaki: Lost Wanderer

O_o; Making no appearance in a while changes everything.

"... .... ...................." I think I'm lost......

*Walks in a random direction.*

Tue, Apr. 4th, 2006, 09:03 pm
anaterasu: (no subject)

(This is the continuation of the topic below. Please post here.)

It all started when Rachel received a threatening letter from the Christian community of Silent Hill

Rachel: *reading the note* "We, the Christian community of Silent Hill, demand that you, the Woop Cult, abandon your satanic beliefs and convert to Christianity. Christianity is the only pathway to god and if you are not Christian, you are evil and you are going straight to Hell. Only by surrendering yourself to our religion, will you be a better person. Everyone knows that Christians are kind and tolerant people. This is why we cannot tolerate your behavior and we ask that you convert. If you do not obey these orders, we will be forced to resort to violence.

Meanwhile, Demon #4 had unprotected sex with a dead fish.

Demon #4: *humping a fish* And... finished! Okay, here's the fishie! *hands the fish to Christa* I don't need her anymore.
Fish: *cry*
Christa: Why is this fish all sticky?
Rachel: I think you might want to throw that away and wash your hands. Quickly. Like now.
Christa: *throws away the fish*
Demon #4: *notices a fish in the trashcan* Oooh! fishie! *eats the fish*
Rachel: Wait, did Demon #4 just eat that fish?
Christa: Yes
Rachel: With that stuff on it?
Christa: Yes, why?
Rachel: Didn't you read the "Demon Raising Handbook"
Christa: Pssh, no. Who needs reading?
Rachel: Christa, I think Demon #4 might get *dramatic pause* pregnant
Christa: You mean, Demon #4 will get pregnant by eating a fish covered in... man sauce?
Rachel: Yes! *dramatic music*
Christa: How is that possible? Does he have ovaries and a uterus in his esophagus?
Rachel: Yes! *dramatic music*
Christa: So that makes Demon #4 a female?
Rachel: Yes! *dramatic music*
Christa: Yet he has a penis. A very, very, very, very, very, very, very tiny penis.
Rachel: Yes! *dramatic music*
Christa: Demon #4 is a hermaphrodite?
Rachel: Yes! *dramatic music*
Christa: So the sperm Demon #4 left on the fish could meet with one of Demon #4's eggs located in his esophagus, thus impregnanting the demon?
Rachel: Yes! *dramatic music*
Christa: Who keeps playing that dramatic music?
Demon Janitor: *in a corner with a radio* Finally, after years of saving, I finally bought myself a radio
Demon #4: Mmm.. radio! *eats radio*
Demon Janitor: Noooooo!!
*No dramatic music*
Rachel: *whips out a stereo and plays the dramatic music

So Christa decided to go to the local pharmacy to buy a pregnancy test to find out if Demon #4 was pregnant.

Christa: Oh, ok. I guess that means Demon #4 is going to be a dad...and a mom...
Rachel: Well, it's not definite. We need to be sure. Christa, go to the store and buy a pregnancy test!
Christa: Why me?
Rachel: Because I said so
Christa: *sulk* Ok...
Rachel: Oh and-*plays dramatic music*

However, this was proving to be more difficult than the young cultist believed...

Christa: Ah, here are the pregnancy tests *takes one*
Christian woman: *GLARE* You whore! You shall pay for your sins of the flesh!
Christa: What th-
Christian woman: *throws stones at Christa*
Christa: Ah! My organs!
Crazed Employee: Hey! Don't injure our customers!!
*Crazed Employee throws a bottle of birth control pills at Christian Women, all hell breaks loose*
Christian Women: You cannot use birth control pills! Birth control prevents women from giving birth to Christian babies! Our brainwashing facility gets its business by brainwashing children! *rage!!*
Christa: I just wanted to buy a pregnancy test! *cries as she's stuck in the middle*
*A police officer happens upon the chaos and calls for backup*
Officer: It's a P-O-C-W.
Voice on the other line: You mean-
Officer: That's right, Pissed Off Christian Women. Can I shoot them?
Voice on the other side: No, you can't shoot them.
Officer: Well, I'll need some backup then.
*SWAT team burst in. Customers are screaming, employees are panicking*
Officer: Everyone stay calm!
Christa: Why me? ;.;
SWAT Officer #1: It's no good. We'll have to use the tear gas!
Crazed Employee: Wouldn't that harm the customers?
SWAT Officer #2:. That's a risk I'm willing to take. Gas them #1!
SWAT Officer #1: Dude, I have a name. It's Steve
SWAT Officer #2: Just use the gas, gas man!
SWAT Officer #1:Christa: *runs out of the pharmacy with the pregnancy test*
Demon #4: *eating a car in the parking lot* SUV in my tummy
Christa:Demon #4: Car is delicious!
Chista: *Picks Demon #4 up* C'mon, before something else happens

Christa survived the trip to the pharmacy. Now, it's time for Demon #4 to take the pregnancy test. This also proves to be the challenge for the cultist...

Christa: Now, what are the instructions for this thing? *reads*
"Thank you for purchasing the OMG Pregnancy Test. The first step to using this is to remove the pregnancy test from the package. SLOWLY! SLOWLY!! Oh god, that was close. Now pour urine over the strip. Yeah, that's right, I said it. You gotta pee on it. Haha, sucks to be you, don't it? Well you should've thought about this before you got pregnant, huh? HUH? Hey, don't you stop reading me, you-"
Christa: Gross...how am I going to get Demon #4 to do this?
Christa: Okay Demon #4. Lis- Hey, don't eat the toliet paper! Demon #4! Look at me, look at me! Ah, screw this! *duct tapes Demon #4 to the toliet so he stops moving* Okay, I need you to urinate on this.
Demon #4: *stares*
Christa:Demon #4: *stares*
Christa:. You know.. the yellow stuff that comes out of you.
Demon #4: *stares*
Christa: You don't know how to pee, do you?
Demon #4: *stares* ... Your head smells like a ham!
Christa: *anime falling down pose* This is going to be harder than I thought... *leaves the room and comes back with a hose* Okay, I am going to make you pee!! *shoves the hose in Demon #4's mouth, thus forcing the demon to drink galloons of water*
Demon #4: *swells up like a balloon*
Christa: This should do it *turns off water* and since I'm not going anywhere never a demon's private parts... *tapes pregnancy test under Demon #4* Now it's just a matter of waiting...
(Eight hours later...)
Demon #4: *is still a swollen balloon*
Christa: How long is this going to take?!
Christa: Does it even pee at all?! Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen a demon use the bathroom...
....

Now Christa must learn the secret to identifying whether a demon is pregnant or not.

Christa: Someone has to know how to tell if a demon is pregnant, but who... WHO?
...
Christa: Do you know how to tell if a demon's pregnant?
Demon #2: I don't, but the Demon Nursemaid does
Christa: We have a Demon Nursemaid?
Demon #2: Of course!
Christa: Where is she?
Demon #2:Christa: ... You're kidding, right?
...

Christa needs to return to the dreaded pharmacy to find the Demon Nursemaid.

Christa: This time, I'm going prepared! No more chaos! No more warfare! I'm going undercover!
*Christa puts on a hat and mustache*
Christa: No one will think I'm a Woop Cult with this disguise! I'm so clever...
...
Christian Woman: It is the satanic whore! Prepare yourself for your demise! Now, my Christian minions... form OMEGA BITCH!
(the Christian women come to form a transformer looking housewife armed with a giant mecha cross)
Christa: This is f***ed up right here *Quickly puts on hat and mustache*
Christian Women: Huh? Where did so go?! Find her!!!
*The rampage continues*
Christa: Please let me live through this.. *cries as she walks into the store*

And now, here's "What the Fuck is Wrong With Those People?" ... otherwise known as "Woop"

Tue, Apr. 4th, 2006, 04:54 pm
anaterasu: (no subject)

(Starting a new RP)

Rachel is reading a scripture about the great Glorvehku (it's the demon the Woop Cult worships) in the cult's library. The cult house is surprisingly quiet. Walter is in his room possibly gutting his newest victim with the demon janitor bitching about the mess he is making. Demon #4 is doing unspeakable things with a dead fish and Demon #2 is pillaging some hobo down the street. Yes, it's a typical day in the cult house.

Yeah, right! Just as Rachel is admiring the tranquility of the cult house, a brick crashes through a window which is conveniently located near Rachel. (isn't that convenient?) Upon further expection, Rachel notices a note that is secured to the brick by a rubber band. She reads the note aloud

Rachel: "We, the Christian community of Silent Hill, demand that you, the Woop Cult, abandon your satanic beliefs and convert to Christianity. Christianity is the only pathway to god and if you are not Christian, you are evil and you are going straight to Hell. Only by surrendering yourself to our religion, will you be a better person. Everyone knows that Christians are kind and tolerant people. This is why we cannot tolerate your behavior and we ask that you convert. If you do not obey these orders, we will be forced to resort to violence.

(Note: This RP is making fun of fundamentalist Christians. I know that all Christians aren't this narrow minded. Please don't take offense. This is a joke.)

Sun, Jan. 29th, 2006, 12:48 am
terminafairy: Basic rules

Since I'm hoping that by organizing Woop Cult, we can get some new membership. Therefore, I'd like to list the rules for everyone:

1. First off, the most basic rule of all: No fighting/flaming other members. If I see flames, they will be deleted. There shouldn't be any anyway, since this is a community where you're supposed to be in-character. We haven't had a problem with this, and I'd like to keep it that way.

2. No god-moding. Anyone not familiar with the term, it means when your character bends reality in their favor. For example, if your character walks in, snaps his finger, and kills everyone in the RP, that's god-moding. You're not allowed to kill off other characters, you're not allowed to be invincible. Again, we've been pretty good with that.

3. As for newcomers, you can role-play original characters (just be sure to give us a good idea who your character is in your first RP post), and you can also role-play Silent Hill characters. There are some already taken though.

4. Now here's the problem I've been seeing: Comment control. We've been getting pretty out of hand with commenting on a single post. If you and other characters are replying back and forth on someone's post, the maximum amount of replies allowed will be 30. After that, simply make a new topic. It's very hard to keep track of 70+ comments, not to mention that there were a lot of major plot points revealed because they got lost in the amount of commenting (and if you see something big about to be revealed, please post a new topic for it).

That's all I got, nothing too major. #4 is the most important issue right now. For questions and comments, e-mail me at Colonel_Muffin@yahoo.com

Sun, Jan. 29th, 2006, 12:45 am
terminafairy: (no subject)

NEW STORY!!

That’s right, we’re starting a brand new story that follows anaterasu's new Woop Cult comic. There’s going to be the same old characters, along with quite a few new ones (and hopefully a lot more new ones, because I want more people to join this time!)

Now first of all, let’s get everyone caught up with the old plot…

Everyone whose been standing in the way of the Woop Cult’s goals (alive or dead) has been captured. Things were going fairly well for the cult, although nothing was really happening other than cultist recruiting. After a new cultist joins, a series of strange events begin occurring. Christa unwittingly releases the soul devourer, Valafar by reading a curse out of a book. The lizard demon, unhappy with it’s current host, begins to look to Henry Townshend as a more suitable candidate.

The problem? If Valafar switches hosts, it’ll kill its previous host. Vincent and Claudia, apparently thinking that the cult would be better in the hands of two incompetent leaders instead of one, takes Christa to Dahlia, who along with several other characters is mysteriously still alive. She seals the demon inside Christa and the cult’s problems now seem to be over with, but for how long?

Now, on with the new plot.

About a year after the Valafar incident…

Christa and Rachel have been seeking the priestess who knew how to awaken the cult’s demon god. Unfortunately, she’s dead. Now the two cult leaders are seeking out her reincarnation with the belief that she carries the ancient priestess’s old secret that could bring back the demon and accomplish their goals. The two leaders stumble across a strange young girl named Aya. Could she be the new leader?

Fri, Jan. 27th, 2006, 04:19 pm
terminafairy: Attention all RPers!

IMPORTANT NOTE: This will be the final post that will wrap up the Valafar storyline. From this point on, there will be a brand new storyline canon to [Unknown LJ tag]anaterasu</lj> is developing. The new plot will have more new characters, plus the old Silent Hill characters. (I will be making a post after this one that summarizes the previous storyline, and explains the new one).

Onward!

----------------

"I don't see why you're dragging me out here," Christa complained as she was being led to the church's basement floor. It was already bad enough that she was pretty much demoted after that demon decided to possess her body. Vincent and Claudia were leading the way, Claudia being strangely silent.

"The cult leaders are getting rather fed up with that demon living inside you. We can't remove it by force alone, but we do know someone who can eliminate that problem," said Vincent.

"Who?" Christa asked. Claudia and Vincent stopped in front of an old-looking door, and Christa nearly walked into them.

"We're here," said Claudia. Funny, Christa couldn't seem to recognize this part of the church. What exactly were they planning to do?

The door opened with an eerie creak and the trio stepped into a dim room. The room was surrounded by mirrors, and a large red symbol was painted on the floor. Christa recognized it immediately and took a step back.

"Come forward, girl. You have nothing to fear," an unfamiliar voice called out. Christa nodded silently, and walked to the center of the room. From the shadows came an old woman, who she didn't recognize. She was frightening, wearing old-looking clothes and a veil.

"So this is the one?" she asked.

"Yes, lady Dahlia," Vincent said.

'Dahlia?! Wait, that couldn't be...' Christa thought.

"I heard your body was taken over by a demon called Valafar. It was very foolish of you to release him, girl. Although I can't remove him from you, I can seal him instead," Dahlia said.

"Wait, so this thing's going to be sealed inside me for the rest of my life?" Christa asked.

"...Yes."

"Oh," Christa replied gloomily.

"Now shut up, the ritual will begin now," Dahlia said. She stood in front of the red symbol, known as the mark of Samael. She began chanting, the symbol beginning to glow as she did. As the chanting grew louder, she felt a sudden sharp pain in her chest. Valafar was trying to escape.

The pain increased, and she dropped to her knees clutching her chest. Valafar's cries were ringing in her ears.

Then the chanting stopped, and she slumped the floor unconsious. There were large claw marks on the floor.

"It has been done," said Dahlia, pleased.

(New story yay!)

Thu, Dec. 15th, 2005, 04:56 pm
anaterasu: Continuing the RP

(The last post was getting too long, so I started a new one. Please continue the RP here. Thank you)

Dahlia: Someday, I shall beat Walter Sullivan's record! And then, I shall be the greatest murderer in all of Silent HIll! Bwahahaha!!
Alessa: Geez mom. You're the greatest role model ever *sighs* I hate my life...
Heather: *Stares at Alessa* ... *suddenly swoops Alessa into her arms* I'M KIDNAPPING MYSELF!!
Alessa: Help me! This crazed woman is taking me away!
Walter: AH! Floating ham! Floating ham!
Demon Janitor: ... Is there a gas leak in here or something?
*insert Katamari theme*

Rachel: Dude, the colors! @.@
Christa: I think.. uh, what?
Rachel: What?
Christa: I thought you were saying something. Don't-don't interrupt me, sparkly elf! God! Anyway, what was I saying?
Demon #4: Pudding!
Rachel: Is that football talking to me? o.o
Demon Janitor: Oooookaaayy... *blinks* What the hell is going on?

PyramidHead: *holds up a sign* Ha Ha My plan is working perfectly Ha Ha

(... Don't ask. And no, I did not inhale.)

Tue, Sep. 6th, 2005, 06:54 pm
anaterasu: (no subject)

(Yes, Christa.. face the inevitable doom.... in this RP of the road trip which shall go horribly, horribly wrong....)

Rachel: *reading a newspaper* Wow! There's a Silent Hill cult convention in New Haven, Indiana!
Christa: Yay! Wait, why are they holding a Silent Hill cult concention in New Haven? Wouldn't it make more sense to host it in Silent Hill?
Rachel: They tried that, remember? Every cult assimilated together and the serial killers from each cult united...

*Flashback*
Walter: I'll kill everyone north, you *points to Charlie Manson* kill everyone in the south and you *points to Adolf Hitler* will kill everyone in the west.
Napoleon: What about me?
Charlie: *evil grin* You can kill at the lollipop guild.
Napoleon: Oh, ha ha.

*End of Flashback..*

Rachel: So, to save money on lawsuits and to end the family members bitching about losing their loved ones, they're now hosting the Silent Hill cult conventions in other cities.
Christa: But, wouldn't the people in those cities end up-
Rachel: IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!
Christa: ... Okay....

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